5 Tips For Harmless Revenge Against A Frenemy

*Disclaimer: I am not encouraging you to actually go out and do this stuff nor am I basing this on actual research (*wink). However, if you do perform the following pranks, the consequences are not my fault (*cues Silkk The Shocker).

The idea of having a frenemy is stupid. Either you is or you ain’t my friend but there are quite a few people who have frenemies, or at least someone who is so annoying that they want to see them suffer.

Yes, holding grudges is bad and all that good stuff,  but sometimes the only therapy is Sadism. We’re all human and contrary to how fronters like to behave, everything does not roll off our shoulders.

The following tips can be used for frenemies, enemies, exes or anyone else you want to torture. It’s up to you. Sometimes taking the high road just isn’t enough.

1. Plant praying mantis eggs in their closet – This one is extreme but praying mantises are effing scary! Imagine pulling this off successfully! And  yes you read correctly, you can actually buy praying mantis eggs. This one obviously only works if you have access to the person’s house. Plan a day to “visit” and discretely drop them in the corner of their closet(s) or possibly in the bathroom. Hide them enough so that they won’t be visible but allow them to breathe so that they can hatch. I won’t tell you where you can get praying mantis eggs from but Google is your friend. Note: You must be sneaky enough to pull this off. If you’re a klutz with no finesse then don’t do it to yourself.

2. Put out a Craigslist ad with their name, email and phone number – Craigslist has tons of ad space for people looking for a “good time,” and tons of perverse weirdos are willing to entertain prurient romps with strangers after dark. Sign your victim up and embellish their profile. Use your imagination. Maybe you want to describe them as a tranny or hermaphrodite, it’s up to you just make it good.

3. Sign them up for various telemarketers/email lists – This is a milder but just as annoying version of number two. Whenever you go somewhere that requires you to fill out your email addy and/or phone number, just jot down theirs. [Insert wicked grin here]

4. False deliveries appearing real – Continually order food to their house/apt from one of their favorite eateries until they get black listed.

5. Itching powder – This is another one also works better if you have access to their apt/house. Plan a “visit” and discretely sprinkle their sheets and various clothing or cloth items. If it’s a co-working then bless their chair. Again, I won’t tell you where you can purchase itching powder but Google will.

Happy trouble making. >0)

Tags: Bust, Frienemy, Glamour, In Style, Marie Claire, Sex and the city

Category: Humor, Misc, RanDUMB